- The worst place to be on a board is next to David Hood when Richardson is on Hood's other side.
- Yes, Marlin is asleep. Wanna make something of it?
- Marshall, Wheeler, Ecton, and Porter all slut for other smokers.
- Bartalone isn't yelling at you because he's angry.
- Bartalone is yelling at you because he's really angry and he's going to rip your freaking head off. Soon.
- Yes, Ecton is belligerent. Wanna make something of it?
- Never, ever, ever share a hotel room with Richardson.
- Mauris doesn't really wear a black uniform with silver lightning collar tabs. It was just a Halloween thing. Really.
- Pasko's Bad Tom. Kobrin's Evil Tom. Get it straight.
- Marshall doesn't really look like Satan, but he really, really likes it when we pretend he does.
- Life was much, much better when Evers and Kulander were around.
- Yes, Richardson is drunk. Wanna make something of it?
- Bill Morse is going to kick your ass one day. Oh yes he is, you just wait, sucker.
- "Buz Eddy" is a pseudonym for a head preserved in a jar at the MIT Mathematics Department.
- Major Bill has been promoted and is now General Invoice.
- If not for the existence of women, Sloth would have played more games than the rest of us put together.
- On the other hand, if not for the existence of the woman he finally snagged, Sloth probably wouldn't host nearly as much as he does now, and the food would definitely be worse
- Okay, we really do lower the ceilings when Melenson's around, and we don't tell him about it.
- We just let Lee have that Golden Blade because he needed a nickname.
- Edward Hawthorne is one of the most evil human beings on the face of our planet. And we like him for it.
- Yes, One-Dot is a Pitkisser. Wanna make something of it?
- Ecton can't dance.
- Desper can hold perfectly still. He's just screwing with you.
- Always underestimate Roy Rink.
- Porter and Marshall were, in fact, separated at birth. It was traumatic. Pity them.
- Yes, Chris Martin is a charming dance instructor with fashion sense. Wanna make something of it?
- We have absolutely no idea why we call him Wonder Ladd. We just do.
- Blue Cable isn't really English, but the accent sure gets him laid.
- "Mike McMillie" does not actually exist. We just couldn't find anyone to nickname "Smacko."
- Richardson accidentally voted for Bill Clinton in 1996.
- One--and only one--of the statements on this page is a lie.
- Seriously. Wanna make something of it?
- PS: The scoring system really sucks.